The Devil's Kid

the neighbour's kid.
SUPERMAN!
BATMAN!
SPIDERMAN!
he's always screaming.
this morning i yelled at him,
'BANANA MAN!'
then i waved a banana in front of him.
my back was facing him and for dunno for what reason he whacked my right ass cheek.
damn pain ah.

New Year Resolutions

Since the new year is coming, might as well get my New Year Resolutions out.

1. Earn money and get my guitar
2. Write many songs
3. Make my ma happy
4. Be a better person
5. Remember to be a better person
6. Less TV, more music
7. Discover my goal in life
8. Always understand what the hell I'm doing
9. Appreciate the world
10. Smile more, smirk less
11. Laugh more, grumble less
12. Bring an umbrella out when it's going to rain
13. Terrorize little kids less
14. Save money
15. Not to smoke or take drugs
16. Try hard to not beat people up
17. Try to not curse and swear
18. Be more political
19. To not be an environmental hazard
20. To not become a terrorist
21. To not abuse and terrorize little old ladies
22. To not cry unless deeply touched
23. To not laugh unless absolute necessary
24. To remember to stop laughing
25. To refrain myself from buying clocks as presents
26. To stop whacking the computer when it hangs
27. To refrain myself from snorting at unfunny jokes
28. To try to not burp all the time
29. To take up Ultimate Farting
30. Write a book
31. To stop wishing that it would snow in Singapore
32. To stop roaring when watching football in the middle of the night
33. Laugh a normal laughter
34. Burp discreetly
35. Try not to let my obsession with Robbie Williams ruin my psychological being
36. To stop hollering songs, but actually sing them
37. Go for counselling once in a while
38. Remember to shit everyday
39. Eat moderately
40. To stop eating my facial wash
41. To be happy when waking up in the morning, but be happier when going to sleep at night
42. Watch more of Channel News Asia and less of Suria
43. Save up soon for a scooter bike
44. Save up soon for a BMW
45. Thank God to have brought me into this wonderful world
46. To be less sarcastic
47. To kick my bad habit of reading orbituaries
48. To be more sociable
49. To not say 'fuck' or 'fuck you' too often
50. To have a shorter list of New Year Resolutions

Err 2 Hungry Ghost Festivals?

i checked the lunar calendar.
okay i actually know how to read a lunar calendar.
so i'm not really entirely useless afterall.
i found out that the hell gate's gonna open twice next year.
apparently one of them's fake.
i dunno.
that's what ma said.
but if one of them is fake,
then how do we know when they're coming out.
that's why we have to do the same preparation and invite and welcome them up here twice.
uhh.
weird.

New Blogskin

woo i like this, man.
there's nothing here except words.
words words words and more words.

The Father of All Cockroaches

IT'S THE TY-RANY! OF NORMA-LITY!
Papa Roach rocks, man.
despite their dumb name.
who wants to be known as the Father of Cockcroaches, anyway.

Oh, Kids

i love the shows in the morning, during weekdays.
i watch Designer Guys, Debbie Travis' Facelift, Jamie Oliver shows.
i've been watching Jamie Oliver's shows since dunno when.
this time the show is called Jamie's School Dinners.
he tries to change the way school kids in England are eating.
cos their cafeteria food are mostly junk.
fish and chips, something weird i remember vividly that's called Turkey Twizzlers.
most of the food deep fried.
contains no vitamins.
all just rubbish lah.
some kids even eat chocolates and sweets during their lunches.
how can they survive man.
Jamie tries to change the cafeteria food to healthier stuff, more veggie and carbo and vitamins.
some schools were a success but some schools failed.
that's quite nobel, right?
he's unlike some celebrities who become successful and stop thinking about others but focusing on themselves.
he puts people's lives in perspective.
he has changed many lives, i agree.
then he has to juggle between this thing he's doing, and his restaurant Fifteen, and his family.
i'd like to check out Fifteen haha.
he has a pretty wife and lovely kids.
this one time i watched the show,
one of his kid, the older one, dunno Popey or Daisy,
he was sitting her on his lap.
suddenly the kid stuck her finger in his dad's chest and said, "hello. i like you."
then Jamie replied, "oh, i like you too."
i dunno what's funny about that but i laughed.
i think kids are crazy.
last night my neighbour's kid's friend came to visit him.
they were out in the corridor.
guess what they were doing?
they zoomed past my door every few seconds.
two kids flying past your doorstep can make you crazy.
and they run very fast.
i really mean zooming.
ZOOOM!
one flies past.
ZOOOOOM!
another flies past.
i wonder what their mothers feed them.
then suddenly the kid next door appears at my doorstep and shouted, "BANG BANG!"
no, he screamed.
i was watching TV.
scared the hell outta me.
then again he screams, "POLICE!"
yeah right.
the kid next door is the loud cop, his friend is the silent superhero.
he just holds his gun and stares.
that one very cute.
he looks like a smaller version of his dad.
same hair cut some more.
the noisy kid damn hyper.
he must be drinking coffee instead of milk.
once, he gave a tarzan yell and thumped his friend on the head.
the boy stared at his abuser then burst out crying.
poor boy, didn't fight back.
and he's older and taller then the noisy kid.

Yay A Job

i've got a job.
i've enough of slacking.
i've no purpose in life, man.
i'm gonna be working in a dim sum restaurant in Chinatown.
the money's okay.
the down side is having to wake up at six in the morning cos work starts at 7am.
i'd probably have to wake up earlier cos i live in Toa Payoh.
it takes 30 fucking minutes to get to Chinatown on bus 143.
have to go past balestier, novena, newton, orchard, blah blah blah blah, then reach Chinatown.
sight-seeing every morning, man.
think of all the stuff i'll buy with the money.
*HUGE GRIN*

Missing School [don't laugh]

i miss school.
i miss 4e4.
i miss the fucking building.
i miss the class' roudiness.
i miss the teachers' reprimandings.
i miss having to rush through homework.
i miss not caring about homework.
i miss mugging for exams.
i miss flunking tests.
i miss getting into trouble.
i miss the canteen food.
i miss morning assemblys.
i miss sleeping on the bus on the way to school.
i miss carrying my bag of school books.
i miss my school books. [i chucked them out. except for History stuff.]
i miss laughing as a class.
i miss sms-ing when the teachers aren't looking.
i miss being united as a class.

The Malaysian Trip

the Malaysian trip wasn't what i expected.
not very fun.
it's only been 10 days.
used to stay there up til two and a half weeks.
Malaysia has changed, fashion-wise.
all those surf brands Billabong, Quicksilver, Ripcurl, Roxy.
but all fake lah of cos, hard to find genuine.
if they sell genuine i don't think anybody will wanna buy.
cos it's expensive there.
there's a shop selling all those fake surf brand stuff where i bought a lotta things.
but some of the shirts looked like those you buy at Pasar Malams.
some for RM10, some for RM15.
but then there are those nicer ones but aren't surf brand stuff that costs around RM40.
and then all those accesories.
they sell stuff that look like they come out of 77th Street.
i think they're trying to be like Singapore leh.
most of the shops look like Far East Plaza's.
instruments there are waaaaaay cheap.
too cheap, to my delight.
accoustic guitars costs about RM300, those basic ones.
electric guitars costs around RM600.
and i was shocked, i saw a drum set going for RM1,280.
if i could i would have bought the drum set.
i only have to find a way to pack that home.
i'm going to get me an electric guitar there next year.
which reminds me,
anybody wanna go shopping next year at Malaysia before the Year End Sale ends?
the last day is 31st Jan, which is also my birthday haha.
i have no problem with the destinations, i know how to get my way around.
or we can plan a class shopping trip together.
book a whole bus to bring us there.
KL?
whee.
let me know if you wanna go.

The Land I Love

so i'm in Malaysia now.

to my dearest yongyong, if you're reading this, who says i can't blog in Malaysia?

he says he misses my blog entries.

well.

we went shopping earlier.

bought some pirated stuff.

CDs, DC shoes and a hoodie.

i love the hoodie!

this is the dream land of piracy, man.

i'll probably get sued for saying this.

but who can resist getting CDs at prices as cheap as RM6 each, along with lyrics?

ma didn't want me to buy a lot.

so i got 2.

only.

=(

but compared to the other things i bought,

wow.

hehehe.

Just A Thought

i want a vote in my own life.

Criss Angel: Mindfreak

last night ate too much of mom's curry.
today i have the diarrhoea thing going on.
i've been shitting like fuck.

watched Criss Angel: Mindfreak last night.
he was good, man.
i mean okay lah, like what a magician is.
he has a rock star look, instead of a magician.
David Blaine is mysterious and stuff, i think he's way better than Criss Angel.
Criss Angel has the face of JC Chasez, the eyes of Rob, and John Travolta's chin.
and he wears eyeliner, oh my God.
David Copperfield is the best there is, i think.
that stunt he pulled, the one that he separated his body into two, that was freaky.
but i was like, 'He's good!'
first magician who has had me at the edge of my seat.
i have a thing for magicians hahaha.

back to Criss Angel.
the fire stunt he pulled wasn't very impressive.
i mean, although he loves his mom and did that for her birthday,
i think i would have died if i was his mom.
i mean, what a thing to do for your mom, right?
by setting yourself on fire?
that put me off.
the voodoo doll trick was good.
he's crazy.

next episode he's gonna do the levitating thing, like when you float off the ground.
like what David Blaine did.
i think Criss Angel is too... cheery.
for a magician.
he's too normal leh.

i don't really like that show much,
not as much as i like Blaine and Copperfield's.
something was lacking.
i don't know what.
i think it's the way he does magic to show off and impress people.
David Blaine does his stuff, freak people out, give a dark smile, then walk away,
let you feel like you've seen a ghost.
okay that's what i like.
like he's does his magic for the sake of magic.
and he can do pretty exteme stuff,
like plucking a chicken's head off and fixing it back.

my relatives are coming over from Malaysia tomorrow.
all 13 of them, or 14.
my house is gonna be packed.
it's my cousin's wedding tomorrow.
wish her all the best.

Just A Thought

i want to hold my breath for as long as it takes.
i want to stop breathing just long enough to know what it would be like to be totally still.
like being just a cough away from death.
not really there - not really here.

New Blogskin

i like this blogskin, man.
suddenly had a strong urge to revert back to a blogger skin.
it looks nice, doesn't it?
there's a nice adult feel to it, cos it's named tequila something.
and there's no more tagboard.
so don't tag loh, people.
in case some bitch comes along and says something nasty again.
like i care.
uhh.

A Peep Into My World

i'm sleeping on a double decker bed.
the top part.
i'm constantly living in fear that i'd fall off and break my neck.
i remember first listening to 'Mockingbird' by Eminem on the radio.
i cried cos it was so emotional.
i was also struck by how emotional a rap song can get.
i'm sure that's just how Eminem is.
then this morning i was listening to his new song 'When I'm Gone'.
it was beautiful.
have you ever realised,
his songs are the most emotional there is in the world of rap.
how hard a man is,
but he can sing about his daughter with so much love and admiration.
yeah but aside from all the other rubbish songs he sings.

i love the darkness.
where no one can see me.
i feel at ease and relaxed.
it's like the darkness just envelopes me and shields me from the bright and demanding rays of the sunlight during the day.
in the darkness i can do things, and no one would holler at me.
cos they can't see me and get at me.

i love books.
i know i sound like a dork saying that but i can't help it.
i love the feeling of being lost in a story.
it's like the book just eats me up and i'm caught up in the story, the characters, and the plot of the story.

The Night of the Prom

it was okay.
the food was okay.
everything was okay.
took a lotta photos after that.
then it seems like everyone went clubbing.
around 13 of us went to this club called the Phunk Bar.
it was okay.
then until around 3am the police came.
i think we weren't supposed to be inside so we had to go before the police checked.
there was a time when the place got oo smoky and i had tears running down my face.
i was like, huh?
you can't imagine what my clothes smelt like.
okay, like, very smoky.
i went home later on and made my mom smell my blazer.
then went to the Bras Basah Kopitiam and Siling, Janice, Zhi Yang, PY, Noviani and I stayed until dawn.
then i went home and slept from 8am to 1.30pm, and from 3pm to 6.30pm.
watched Li Jia Wei get defeated by China girl Zhang Xue Ling.
table tennis is too intense.
not my kinda sport.
i still prefer soccer.
but now no soccer.
swimming is good.
Mark Chay!
hahaha.
our water polo team not bad.
get gold every year.
i love sports.
can't wait for the World Cup next year.

Just A Thought

i want to be six years old again - just for a day.
it's not that things were so much better back then.
they sucked.
but i was the kind of kid who knew how to laugh about it all.
that's what i want.
i want to laugh.

Malaysian Police Made China Girl Strip

apparently some Malaysian police made a China girl strip naked and do squats.

wah lau.

they ruin my country lah.

bastards.

The Longest Blog Entry in the World

prom's just a few days away.
it's become another burden for most of us i think.
i mean, have to worry about this and about that.
haiyah.
it's weird, man.
now that o levels are over and all,
there's still something else that bugs me.
it's not the prom, i know.
but it's something i can't figure out.
i dunno what is it.
i keep dreading something.
these few days quite lethargic.
uhh.
the people in IRC really have no life, man.
you use your nick as something which hints that you're female,
immediately after you log in so many people wanna talk to you.
i used my nick as 'blogger', or 'silhoute'.
i stayed there for half an hour nobody talked to me.
except for a guy named 'cable' who keep showing me the link to some porn website
and i told him to fuck off.
but these people never get back at you.
i think i'll try and curse and curse at him until he gets irritated.
sigh.
see what i've becomed?
i've becomed an ass who enjoys irritating people.
i've degraded, man.
*heaves a loud sigh*
and then IRC ah.
the two words that have been said to me the most in my life online is..
guess.
'dirty chat?'
wtf.
now i just have to copy the two words 'fuck off',
and put it to use if anyone uses the god forbidden words with me.
then you ask me why i go IRC then?
i go there to talk to nice and interesting people,
and have met quite a few.
although some i lost contact with,
but the longest friend i've had from there is for about two and a half years.
not bad already.
i've just realised.
i hate musicals.
so from now on,
i'm not gonna spend money watching movie musicals or just musicals.
i can't stand people singing their dialogues.
haha that's a good way to put it.
i watched phantom of the opera,
i can't watch it another time.
i got very bored.
and the singing irritated me.
and corpse bride.
it was worse.
a musical cartoon.
what's with musicals?
they want to sing what they say.
like very ridiculous right?
to think i was in the school choir for 4 years.
lalalala.
my sis keeps wearing my school tie which i now hang on my handphone charger for decoration and to signify that i love my school a lot (bleagh) to just put it on her and pretend she's Zheng Zhe from Wang Zi Bian Qing Wa.
i missed the chance to meet David Beckham, man.
one of my biggest regrets in my life, along with other things.
that time he came down for the Olympics thing.
that day i had school lah.
should have skipped school, man.
then another time he came with Man Utd lah.
aiyah Man Utd going down the drain already.
keep losing good players.
some people say it's the issue between Sir Alex Ferguson and Beckham that made him leave.
and the offer of dunno how much for him to join Real Madrid was the chance to go.
Ferguson don't like him mah.
but why do this to him, man.
he's been there since he was like, 11.
he joined the kiddo team for Man Utd lah.
it was his home.
wah lau i think already become so gek sim.
shat.
i've really degraded.
too much reading of rockson's blog has made me write the way he writes.
minus the &^@#%!*^% things.
hahaha.
my this entry very long hor?
cos i have nothing to do.
haha Jude Law very cute.
he's on my wallpaper.
his olive green eyes looking so intense,
he's expressionless.
and his right arm crossed over to his left shoulder with a cigarette clenched between his fingers.
wow.
looks no use lah.
he cheated on his wife.
slept with his kid's hot nanny.
i laughed when i read the article.
damn funny hahaha!
see?
celebrities and movie stars are all sot sot up there.
they can't think straight, man.
they are always looking for trouble.
or maybe just looking for publicity.
yah cos Jude Law hasn't been on the headlines lately.
the new Madonna song's quite hot.
'Hung Up'.
nice.
but then the thing i don't like about her is that she's had 11 abortions.
or more than that cos when i heard about that, it was two years ago.
kill so many babies loh.
she so rich,
can give birth and donate her babies to a football team hahaha!!
but if she really give birth to so many babies she sure die.
die a mother pig hahahaha!!
i want my blog to be famous,
like XiaXue, Rockson, and Blinkymummy.
nah don't want lah.
then it'll take forever to load the web page.
too many comments haha.
Rockson has over 200 comments for some of his entries.
he's a typical Singaporean ah beng.
but don't Singaporeans just love ah bengs?
oh come on, Singapore produce ah bengs!
this entry will take a long time to publish haha.
all thanks to my lagging computer and dumb internet connection,
it has made me what i am today.
back to the subject of IRC.
there was once, not too long ago,
that i met a girl.
she's a lesbian.
she's 15.
and she told me her friends dared her to try to wear a vey short skirt with no panties underneath.
then she told me the length of the skirt i'm like WHAT?!
i've never seen such a short skirt.
or maybe she's just exagerrating.
she says, 'until the butt there.'
i was thinking,
then you can go and die,
wear such a short skirt zao geng then that's the end of you.
males of all ages will follow you home and line up outside your door step.
but then again she don't like men,
she's a lesbian.
and she's 15.
then another guy told me he lost his virginity at 13.
then i'm like,
at 13 your bird bird can't even work properly lah.
Singaporeans aren't who you think they are.
oh my god get the proper perspective of the way you think of Singaporeans.
now i don't like Singapore even more.
but i don't have a problem with that.
i just have a problem with the citizens and the government.
which leads me to think again,
why am i so irritated at everything?
but i will just tell myself,
you're just too paranoid after living on this earth for 16 years.
maybe you should go and die and everything will be okay.
don't have to face Singapore and the government.
and don't have to face prom night.
and don't have to face everything.
and you should thank your ma for giving birth to you into this bloody country where kids have sex at 13!
if i tell this to my grandma, she will have a heart attack plus stroke plus fits and die.
choy ge lei!
my grandma will live a long life.
long live the ah ma!
i will die first before she dies.
is this the world's longest blog entry?
i think it is.

Me Got Spammed

someone spammed me.

in my tag board.

like i care, you bitch.

and i know who you are.

BITCH.

Just A Thought

i want to get myself real high.
i want to get so far off the ground that my hair gets caught on cloud dust.
cloud dust is that stuff clouds leave behind when they're floating fast across the sky.
that's what i want.
cloud dust.

The Match

oh man!
Singapore win Myanmar 1-0!
which means for Singapore,
we achieved 2 victories, 1 draw, and 1 defeat.
haha the match was good.
WE were good.

Emotionless

here's a song the Madden brothers wrote, which can be found on their second album, The Young & The Hopeless.

a little song, but means ever so much.

Emotionless

hey dad, i'm writing to you
not to tell you that i still hate you
just to ask you how you feel
and how we fell apart, how this fell apart.
are you happy out there in this great wide world?
do you think about your sons?
do you miss your little girl?
when you lay your head down
how do you sleep at night?
do you even wonder if we're alright?
we're alright
we're alright

it's been a long hard road without you by my side
why weren't you there all the nights that we cried?
you broke my mother's heart
you broke your children for life
it's not okay
but we're alright
i remember the days you were a hero in my eyes
but those are just a long lost memory of mine
i spent so many years learning how to survuve
now i'm writing just to let you know i'm still alive

the days i spent so cold, so hungry
were full of hate, i was so angry
the scars run deep inside this tattooed body
there's things i'll take to my grave
but i'm okay, i'm okay

it's been a long hard road without you by my side
why weren't you there all the nights that we cried?
you broke my mother's heart
you broke your children for life
it's not okay
but we're alright

i remember the days you were a hero in my eyes
but those are just a long lost memory of mine
i spent so many years learning how to survuve
now i'm writing just to let you know i'm still alive

and sometimes i forgive
yeah and this time i'll admit
that i miss you
said i miss you

it's been a long hard road without you by my side
why weren't you there all the nights that we cried?
you broke my mother's heart
you broke your children for life
it's not okay
but we're alright
i remember the days you were a hero in my eyes
but those are just a long lost memory of mine
i spent so many years learning how to survuve
now i'm writing just to let you know i'm still alive
and sometimes i forgive
yeah this time i'll admit
that i miss you
i miss you...
hey dad.

Oh Boredom, the Great Evil

haa.
made a new friend on IRC today.
he's nice and crazy hahaha.
still can't get over IRC man.
IRC's the place to either make friends, enemies, or just to cyber.
LOL.
if only MSN was as good as IRC.
but just like my friend said, MSN is killing the world.
ahhh.

so bored man.
nothing to do at home.
these days i keep myself busy by cleaning my room.
yeah you must be thinking.
you're THAT bored?!
yeah i am.
but it feels good too.
to see my room clean for once.
haha.

cleaned out my computer too.
deleted all the rubbish that was supposed to be deleted long ago but didn't go around to delete them.
haa.

The Ultimate Cuss Phrase

just thinking.

i wanna scold someone,

"Feck you, you motherfecker!"

it'll be funny.

LOL.

py's dying huiling's hair now.

i'm bleaching some of my hair.

wahahahahahahaha.

Coloured Hair

i've dyed my hair.

but i can't see it.

other people can see it.

but i still can't see it.

what the hey, forget it.

thks py for helping me with it.

huiling's gonna get hers done in the afternoon.

lol py should really collect money for helping people dye their hair.

when's the next match?

ahh hope we win this time round.

don't shake your head man.

our team not bad already.

unlike the Indonesians.

cheaterbugs.

lol okay i have nothing against them.

haa.

yawns man.

sian.

what am i to do with this three months of free time if i don't get a job?

to blog daily of course!

uhh?

well then again i'm really just a natural born lazy asssss.

i love saying that.

lazy asssss.

abbie the lazy assssss.

abbie the lazy asssss with a big assssss who's really just a dumb assssss.

uhhhh.

i'm halfway through this book

about Sven-Goran Erikkson the England football coach.

this book is about his leadership qualities and how we can improve our leadership qualities.

2 weeks already and i'm still wondering why i got this book in the first place.

cos holding it in my hands makes me look like a pro.

haha i've got a big ego.

oh and i've got sideburns.

py helped to dye the sideburns too.

but i don't hink the got on very well.

i joked that i wanted to get my eyebrows done.

but what the fuck is with my corny jokes they don't get anyone laughing.

i'm really just a natural born lazy assss with a dumb sense of humour who desperately wants to make people laugh but can't.

oh man i'm such a loser.

a loser who's blogging to let the whole world see what a loser i am.

shat.

reached home at about 8am
took a long shower and scrubbed my feet til they were bright red.
hahaha.
slept like a log til 1pm.

oh man.
watched the match between Singapore and Indonesia.
Indonesians so cheeeat one!
they play foul lah.
but they ended up 0-0.
ah waste of time man.
i thought Singapore would win.
but can see that they did their best lah.
our captain shed tears.
which brought me back to think,
where the hell is Aide Iskandar?
he was the captain during the Tiger Cup.
lol the Tiger Cup rocked man.
next match is against Myanmar i think.

oh yeah.
this goes to show that the Indonesians were a bit humji also.
okay lah one player.
he was going to score,
very close to scoring.
but he hesitated because of Lionel Lewis lah i think.
lol.
he scared mah.
cos he's tall.
haha he has ridiculously long legs
which makes him like,
the goalkeeper with the best potential.
not that he's not good lah.
HE'S THE BEST.

GO TEAM SINGAPORE!

hmm.

i've discovered my love for blogging long ago

but haven't been around to blog.

uhh.

o levels ended now i realise i don't really have nothing to do except look for work but then again i'm just a natural born lazy assssss.

uhh.

haven't slept the whole night haha cos had bbq last night

after that me amanda sockhoon huiling and py were looking like idiots thinking we could walk all the way from pasir ris to amk.

we walked for an hour but were still at pasir ris drive 1.

we walked from end to end.

then a cab driver took us back to amk for free.

there were 3 vertical lines on the side of my head when they said they wanted to walk the expressway. PIE SLE OR CTE whatever.

it's looooooooong man.

will die man.

i sat at the curb several times.

hurhur.

my legs are still muddy man.

the mud is imprinted on my legs.

we must support our Team Singapore okay.

we must have the Singapore team spirit.

we cannot forever support other country's football teams like Man Utd Liverpool shit.

and what about local talents.

not everybody support local singers and bands right.

aiyahh.

kek sim ah.

ahh fuck.

everyday starts with studying and ends with studying/

can't wait for all this to be OVER.

can't wait as in want to take a pee but no toilet around and can't wait to sit on one that type.

after 'O's get a job.

earn some money.

get my guitar.

go to Malaysia.

arrgh.

oh yeah.

it is confirmed.

i'm gonna go to Thailand with vivien and her sis come February.

haha bungee jumping baby!

i'm gonna sing my heart out when i'm on the way down.

WTF?!!

listening to Perfect 10 now.

the '9 million bicycles in Beijing'

that song.

what is the world coming to.

people singing this kind of song.

like the White Stripes song.

here i go thinking about the doorbell

thinking about the doorbell

when you gonna ring it

when you gonna ring it

LOL.

err rock is still my type.

not this kind of crap song.

some can't feel it.

but there're emotions and feelings behind every note and pitch played by instruments.

like 'a picture paints a thousand words'?

i'd say 'an instrument paints a thousand words'.

you can feel the sadness, the angst, the pain

behind every song.

of course the lyrics play a big role but the instruments help narate the song.

lyrics are important.

whoever will think of writing songs concerning bicycles in beijing and doorbells

ahh and of course 'the voice'

yeah.

there's a jail in Punggol?

just thinking.

i'm definitely gonna write a book.

i wanna narate someone's life.

there's this popstar..

okay i just wanna write about him.

he grew up in a broken family.

screwed around in school.

took drugs, drank alot, yeah the stuff.

then joined a band.

became very very huge in the UK.

but he was the youngest in the group, see.

he felt he didn't belong.

then met someone from a famous rock band.

screwed around somemore.

now that he's rich,

he took more drugs, drank alot more,

fucked around with women.

basically he just wasted his life away.

then he tried to get himself back.

went for therapy and all that.

he's a better man now.

but there's this hurt soul in him,

although behind the facade you couldn't see a glimpse of that.

he's very famous, very big,

but something was lacking in him.

people around him want to heal him.

women do.

but he doesn't have many friends.

but the thing that inspired me about him is that

he's able to take control of himself and change back to his old self.

his better self.

he knows how much his family and friends love him.

he's not just gonna let them down like that.

that's something to learn from him.

i'm still waiting for him to come to Singapore.

just thinking.
life is not destined.
if i'm to die tomorrow,
i can change that.

something inspirational just struck me.
think i'm gonna write a book.

err ben's face is hidden.
anyways.
i'm happy to say that i'm blogging almost daily.
remember a time when i didn't blog for months?
well what's the point of having a blog then?

this morning i was reading a book.
when suddenly my neighbour's 2 year old son started wailing like crazy.
followed by his mother's screams of abuse at her son.
then i heard whacks of cane on skin.
followed by more wailing, all along getting louder.
then she screamed like a mad woman,
"stop crying!"
and piacks of the cane.
and everytime she screamed"stop crying!",
she whacks her kid even harder.
i was getting very irritated by the din they were making.
i was trying to read!
i thought,
how the hell is your kid gonna shut up when you keep beating him.
he was in pain for God's sake!

i like that kid.
he's nice.
cute.
playful.
all the good things you see in toddlers.
a few nights back.
i got off the elavator.
he was there,
he shyly said a 'hello'.
he just learnt to say that.
after that he giggled and ran to his mum.
i said hello back and smiled at him.
he brightened up my day.

i don't understand why his mum is always beating him up or hurling abuse at him.
he's your son, if you're not gonna love him,
why the hell did you give birth to him then?
got hole in the condom arhh?!
even if the kid's in the wrong you could always lecture him or talk to him nicely what.
he's just 2!
he celebrated his birthday 2 nights ago!
c'mon lah, give him a good childhood.

when i have kids.
i'm gonna give them the best.
i think every kid deserves a good childhood.
when they grow up, they get to think back and say nice stuff about their childhood.
like his 3rd birthday, his first attempt at cycling.
his first toy.
definitely not his first caning!

yeah.
to give him the happiest days as a kid

me, py and ben took this on the night of the night of the GC interview on Sunday.

before that we went for sting ray. it tasted horrible.

i guess being a teenager is hard.
nobody said it was easy.
experiencing many different emotions at once.
blowing your top.
feeling angry all the time.
easily agitated.
easily irritated.
not feeling so happy anymore.
i wonder if my friends are feeling the same way.
cos i feel that my temper's getting way out of hand.
when i get angry,
i want to hit people.
destroy things.
to inflict pain on something else rather than bottling it all up inside.



i'd feel like this.

you'd say it's good not to keep everything inside,
but it gets worse all the time.
my temper gets worse.
i can't take crap from anyone.
it always gets to me.
my adult friends all say it's normal.
just ignore them.
but i can't.


i wonder if i'll grow up to be a murderer.
i know you must be thinking,
"stop thinking all these bad thoughts, abbie!"
but then..
i dunno what i think most of the time.
mostly my mind's just blank.
i think if this emotional problem doesn't improve,
i REALLY WILL KILL SOMEONE.
notice that i've been hating people a lot.
maybe if i'm really not normal,
the emoions thing doesn't improve,
i'll go to the extend of hating someone until i kill him/her.
is that scary?
yeah i think so.
then i get scared of thinking why the hell i'm thinking these kind of things.
THIS IS ABSOLUTELY NOT NORMAL.
come on, everyone around me are happy.
am i the only miserable one around?

is this depression?
no, i know depression is much worse.
i haven't considered commiting suicide.

okay lah.
it's just me and my mood swings.

i know you always see abbie smiling.
but that's just a facade behind my real self.
i'm just this angry monster inside.

i want to be a kid again.
being a kid was easy.
play all the time.
instead of war all the time.
war against myself.
when i'm angry,
occassioanlly, i'd feel stuff being thrown around in my head.
as if my emotions aren't sure of what to do with each other.
they fight.

sometimes i'm angry.
most of the time.
but when i'm happy, i'm VERY happy.
it just doesn't seem right.
how can anyone be furious one minute and be cheerful the next?!
is there something wrong with my hormones?
i need more happy cells!

i always feel rebellious.
nobody can tell me what to do.
even my friends.
i guess i just don't like the feeling of people instructing me.
something like that.
then i won't do it.

then there's something else that's wrong with me.
at this age.
girls usually are obsessed over guys.
but i'm not.
HUH?!
it's not like i like girls lah.
but this is just not normal!
ahh i'm not gonna post what i feel about my sexuality online

and i hate.
to see people blog about how their day has passed.
a report of what they had done that day.
nobody wants to read that!

i'm just thinking.
since singapore is so little.
maybe i'd get the chance to bump into Xie Shaoguang on the streets.
and i'd ask him to sign on my shirt.
okay lah.
i'm only obsessed about this guy

the Hungry Ghost Festival ends this Saturday.
but i haven't met my Grandpa yet.
please don't freak out over what i've said.
i just want to meet him.
dead or alive.
i'm sure he was a great man.
cos he made 14 kids.
ahurhurhurhur!!

stop acting like you're a rich kid, spoilt and pampered brat, alright?
now you're the other one who's strutting around.
i wonder if anyone's noticed that.
WELL I DID.
and it's making me sick.
and you're all materialistic and fussy all the time.
it plainly IRRITATES ME!
UURGH!

was discussing with py and fiona about our future careers and what we'd do.
py wants to some design thing.
fiona i'm not really sure.
i knew that i wanted to do stuff that don't require accademic studies to help us.
i wanted to open a restaurant, but where do i get the money.
i want to set up a bakery store, but i need the money too.
so i decided that i want to write.
i'll choose the path of journalism maybe.
write for a local magazine.
interview popstars and actor actresses.
preferably Lime haha.
the writers are cool.
or maybe i'll write a book.
and it may became a national bestseller,
or better yet, international bestseller.
you know people who write books earn more with one book than popstars.
well of cos it depends on how long they stay in the business lah.
hmm write books.
earn a quick buck here and there.
or if i can get to a JC
maybe after JC i'll study the history of religion.
yeah.

okay.
i'm serious abbie.
prelims are starting next week.
so no more slacking for you!

alright.
just a note to wake me up.

listening to Simple Plan's Untitled now.
what's up with the title.
haha but it's a beautiful song.
i wonder what it'll sound like if MCR or Thursday does a song like that.
a ballad or something.
but Simple Plan has changed a lot since their first album.
i used to think their songs are too teenage-y.
like for 12-13 year olds.
and that singer's voice is whiny.
but he sounds better now.

woo now listening to GC's first album, the young and the hopeless.
i think their first CD was better.
more pop.
they sound good doing pop.
yoooou, don't wanna be just like you
what i'm saying is this is the anthem
throw all your hands up
yoooou, don't wanna be YOU!

haha that was MY anthem.

don't think rock will ever die.
i dread to think that techno will be the hottest thing in town one day.
no offence Yi Fong!
techno songs make no sense, really.
mwahaha.

urgh.
don't feel like heading out today.
but have to go for that interview thing.
i wonder what mag is it from.
but since the meeting place is Orchard.
maybe i'll beg my mom for some money to buy that shirt.

reached home at about 2 plus.
was thinking whether to go for Ming Sheng's party or not.
decided not to cos been partying too much.
so might as well rot at home, along with my books.

i was reading one hilarious guy's blog just now.
his name is rockson and pls go check out his blog.
www.rockson.blogspot.com
he may not be as famous as Xiaxue, but damn this guy is funny.
haha with his Hokkien stuff and 'Gahmen' - government- things.

yeah and spent the afternoon doing some stuff.
yesterday bought September's issue of Lime.
there was a clear folder along with it.
man i love the people at Lime.
i've been reading that mag for years, considering i'm only 16.
anyways.
the folder's cover was the army thing.
so i spent the afternoon cutting and taping pictures to the folder
and wrapped it up with clear plastic.
and stared at it for half an hour.
for a while i thought the folder was cooler than me.
okay lah, it's really nice what.
haha.

doope.
audrey asked her friend to postpone the interview to tomorrow.
cos peiying had to rush.
haha.
must make my hair nice nice cos got photoshoot.
if i can i'll pose my signature pose.
wah.
LOL.

ohh yah.
don like the MCR skin no more.
dunno why also.
shit, i've been speaking Singlish alot.
oh yeah!
i saw this shirt at Far East yesterday with Singlish words.
something lah.
something something lah.
all that shit.
quite nice so i'm gonna buy it.
to think that just a few months back i was on the IRC 'promoting good English'.
hoho.

anyways.
i want a plain skin.
so there it is.
not too complicated or what.
my life's complicated enough.

next week prelims start.
*groans*
i can't even bear to talk about it so i'll not talk about it.

to whoever you are.
you know who you are.
you smsed me last night when a few months ago i smsed you and told you that i didn't wanna talk to you no more.
i'm sorry for saying that.
cos i didn't mean it.
these few months never talk to you my free sms didn't exceed.
my fingers weren't working hard enough.
realised that there's no fun in life without free smses exceeding.

okay that was 100% BULLSHIT.
i dunno what i'm talking.
i know you won't read my blog or whatever but thanks for the message.
it warmed my cold little heart a bit.

I WANT TO MEET ROBBIE WILLIAMS.
if he ever comes to Singapore again.
i will see his concert.
if i have no money for the tickets.
i will rob my mom, rob my dad, rob my teachers, rob my friends, rob the bank, rob anything i can rob to see ROB.
mwahaha.

there's this BMW wallpaper on my desktop.
i figured.
transportation is very important to me.
so in the future.
if i'm rich, i'll get meself a BMW.
or if i'm not, i'll get a mini cooper.
it's either big or small.
if i have a lotta children (which i most probably won't),
i'll get a space wagon.

ugh i dunno what i sat on yesterday but my arse hurt.

was at ben's bbq party just now.
hurhur quite fun.
before that took neoprint and bought kam seng and ben's present.
then am now thonning at vivien's house.

audrey asked to be interviewed by her friend, about some Good Charlotte stuff for a magazine.
urm haha.
joel rocks.
so does billy.
i'm gonna be on magazine!

mwaha. :)

MY GOD.

the band members of Thursday look good.
i mean, good-looking.
well they look good, but there's this chubby guy.
but who says chubby guys don't look good too? ;p

OMG.
i was on the bus that day and sorta watched a little of this show on TV-Mobile [the greatest invention Man has ever known. ta-da, the tv is everywhere you go, even the BUS]
well if i'd have been blogging earlier, i'd have tons to say about this TV-Mobile thing.
anyways, i watched this show of rock bands.
then i caught a little of what i thought was Thursday's music with my ear that wasn't blasting MCR on the MP3.
i really thought it was them so i took a closer look.
there was this guy with loud plaited bangs banging on his guitar.
i was taken aback.
Thursday guys are LIKE THAT?!
then i went back to staring out the window.
still a little shocked to see that my currently band is like this.
i have nothing against people like that,
but it's just that his voice doesn't match his well.. appearance on that tv.

haha but my intuition is always right.
i thought something was wrong.
lol it really wasn't them.

like, you know some people's voices suit some people but some don't suit right?
like the Calling's [wheepee] vocalist Alex Band.
who would have bloody thought his voice of a deep menacing growl belonged to a face of boyish demure look?
got another shock that they actually look good.
audrey kindly lent me her bro's Thursday's first album.
then there's this little introduction of Thursday thing.
of course they put their posters and photos all that.

second thing.
from now onwards.
for the rest of my life.
i am never ever not in a thousand million years.
going to consume a drop of sharks fin soup.
fishermen catch them and cut their fins and chuck them back in the water.
helplessly, without their fins, they either starve to death or bleed to death or very bloody well get eatened by other sharks.
they're gonna be extinct soon.
with people out of their sodding minds thinking that sharks fin soup is a DELICACY.
you big greedy bastards slurp on every bit of the soup and wanting for more.
never thinking about where the hell sharks fin come from.
sharks suffer the fate of getting killed by the numbers everyday.
yet you think the satisfaction of your bulging stomachs is worth more than a shark's life?
the sharks have done nothing to us.
but the occasionally injuries of Man caused by sharks is only the misunderstanding of Man towards the beautiful beasts of the ocean.
the sharks sometimes mistake surf boards as seals.
only when there is a hint of blood do they attack.
but yet Man has been killing sharks for the filling of their fucking stomachs.
are all of you hungry sodding wankers out of your fucking minds?!
go kill your ugly neighbour if you're dying for a delicacy.

yesterday was at Holland V with sufong, sockhoon,huiling and py.
there's this fantastic furniture and decorations shop.
we spent quite some time rummaging through stuff.
haha quite fun actually yesterday.
cept for me falling and doing a fucking split.
sockhoon pushed me followed by huiling.
then when i ran to push huiling back.
i slipped and fell.
and did a split.
my first attempt.
you could imagine the difficulty i had trying to stand up and walk properly.
and trying not to laugh and snort like a pig.
lucky there was no one around other than us.
i could imagine aunties sniggering behind me.
well that fall was a bloody good one.
i suppose a crash landing on my arse would be more comfortable.
yeah my first warning of not to scuttle around in chuck taylors.
ahaha.

you don't know how selfish some people can get.
and they don't even care about it.
they don't care what people think.
some at least when they realised it, they try to change.
but some just DON'T CARE.
you tell them straight in the face.
they don't give a damn.
that made me really sick.
i shudder to think of them.
it was initially one person.
but it spread throughout the group like a plague.
now the whole gang's caught that disease.
and they JUST DON'T CARE.
a lotta people hate all of you, alright.
every single friggin hair on your bodies.
don't think you're popular and everybody loves you.
you just make people sick to their stomachs.
don't think that the way you dress nicely and act like you're pretty
means everyone has noticed you.
well they noticed you.
and felt disgusted.
that's how i feel too.
YOU DRESS LIKE SLUTS.
YOU SHOULD BE EMBARRASSED.
your heck-care attitudes made everyone despise you.
and your acted-up angsty attitude.
seriously, you think you're cool?
you follow behind people's asses.
you don't have a style on your own.
you COPY.
whatever kind of music you listen to are music that popular people listen to.
and sometimes you're so far behind in music that
whenever you talk to me about those songs,
i'm already sick of them.
you are so outdated.
don't try to act punk.
cos you'll never look cool.
punk only belong to people who have their own style who truly believe in themselves.
you believe in other people, for God's sakes.
don't make yourself believe you like rock music.
cos you only think it's cool after i've gotten addicted.
SO LONG after i'm listening to it.
yeah you really follow behind people's asses.
MY FAT ASS.
and stop those vulgarities please.
i'm saying the word please cos you dunno how everyone think that's crude coming from girls.
i'm helping to spare you from further humiliation.
you're friendly only to your own gang.
all of you look down on others.
and you FLIRT like there's no tomorrow.
you don't even spare the young ones.
stop touching them when you talk to them please.
i bet they feel really dirty when touched by you.
you carry out conversations with your mouth, not your hands,
in case you didn't know that.
you think you're friendly?
you're friendly only to guys, come on.
and you gossip like fuck.
nothing can escape you.
you don't have your own opinion.
i think you're such a dumb-wit bimbotic sluttish person you don't even know you don't have your opinion
in everything even if it slaps you in your ugly face.
black is so not your colour cos your true colour is PINK.
stop buying black stuff cos you look like shit in them/with them.
well i guess you don't look nice in EVERYTHING.
even if you're coated with my shit.
stop those hokkien words.
you don't even know what they mean please don't spoil the culture.
it's not cool.
again, i think it's crude.
sounds really disgusting with English, really.
I WON'T FORGET THIS.
YOU COPIED MY IDEA OF MY ESSAY AND SCORED HIGHER THAN ME.
WHEN I WAS NICE ENOUGH TO LEAK TO YOU THE FRIGGIN QUESTION.
YOU STOLE MY IDEA!!
AND YOU DARED TO BE HAPPY ABOUT YOUR RESULTS.
AND ONCE AGAIN, YOU WERE STUPID ENOUGH NOT TO EVEN NOTICE
THAT YOU STOLE MY IDEA AND GOT HIGHER MARKS.
AND THAT I WAS ANGRY!!
WHY ARE YOU SO INSENSITIVE TO PEOPLE'S FEELINGS?!
YOU ONLY CARE ABOUT YOURSELF!
WHATEVER THAT HAD HAPPENED TO ME, YOU DIDN'T CARE!
I SUPPOSE I'M SMART ENOUGH TO KNOW THAT I'M NOT GONNA CARE,
OR EVEN WASTE MY TIME AND ENERGY TALKING TO YOU.
I WILL NOT, GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOU AND YOUR FRIENDS.
rock and punk are not your style.
it has never been and never will be your style.
cos you don't have a style.
your style can change overnight.
you don't have a friggin mind of your own.
you follow others.
that's what you'll do for the rest of your life?
honestly i'm sad.
FUCK
to think i thought i was your best friend.
i don't care now.
PLEASE CONTINUE DOING A GOOD JOB OF EXPANDING YOUR 'HATE YOU CLUB'.
i'm one of them.
[this is not a bitching post, cos i haven't revealed THEIR names.]
for all i know, this may become the official blog to bitch about THEM.
but this is not bitching.
it's only my feelings of sadness.
don't even thinK that i'm angry.
i'm not gonna be angry and harm my health over you.
cos i'm matured enough to know that THERE ARE SHITTY PEOPLE LIKE YOU IN THE WORLD.
unlike you, always angry over certain things.
this and that this and that.
i hope you die early.
i won't even attend your wake.
cos you'll look ugly in your casket.
I HOPE YOU DIE AND BURN IN HELL.
I HOPE SATAN STICKS A NEEDLE IN YOUR EYE.

i'm searching for oasis' old albums now.
pls someone tell me where to find old CDs.

i'm at huiling's house now wahas.
went for pasta at pizza hut just now.

wahas.

wahas.

like my new blogskin?
MCR's been rawwkin my world since i dunno when.
okay now i'm on the search for their older albums.
hehs.

yesterday was at vivien's house doing a little make-over thing for her birthday.
py, sock hoon, huiling, fiona and i were there.
quite fun haha.
then we took this little video whereby fiona sat on the window ledge of vivien's bedroom.
[but outside was the balcony duh!]
then fiona sang this lalala song then suddenly py ran over and pushed fiona over!
so it looked like fiona fell downstairs but she was actually on the balcony.
haha quite funny.
then sock hoon, huiling, and i went to town to eat mee sua.
then was at Taka when we saw hanhui and his sis.
then went home and was totally SHAGGED.
damn i like my blog.:)

ohh yeah.
that GC concert.
haha rawwked duh.
i took photos like crazy.
i was videoing 'we believe' midway when the camera's memory was full.
darn.
people pushed me and i pushed back harder.
AUDREY WORE FISHNET!
haha she was cool.
then went home and felt like shitt.
the next day strained my hurting arm and became worse.
i had trouble dressing.
it still hurt.

the killers' songs are haunting me.
'there ain't no motive for this crime.
jenny was a friend of mine.
so c'mon, oh c'mon, oh c'mon.
ohhhh!~'

that song's probably about a guy knowing this girl
and falling for this girl.
they had a fight on the promenade out in the rain.
then probably he raped her or what.
then killed her.
and sang there's no motive for this crime.
and her name's jenny.
and she was a friend of his.
and not forgetting the 'so c'mon, oh c'mon, oh c'mon.'
it's almost infuriating.
mwahaha.

then that 'somebody told me'
i don't understand the song.
it's crazy.

right.

i'm in the midst of exams haiyah haiyah.

i'm looking forward to the sleepover at ying ying's hse!

thanks ying ying!

hurhur.
just hope that i'll be able to go.

ohh how i miss my malaysia.
darn.

after my 'O's i'll fly straight there.
and be with them.

ohh yah.
chinese paper was so damn tough!
no wonder.
it was mrs chang the wonderwoman who set the paper.
she's the one with the ridiculously scary comprehension passages.

and i forgot to bring my dict for paper1.
am i dumb or what?
so i scuttled around sch asking for dicts from teachers but to no avail.

but when i was walking towards the Pupils' Welfare Room.
i see a chinese dict lying unattended on the floor!
it was my lucky day man.
it almost said 'PICK ME UP' on the white cover.
without the dict i think i would have failed that paper cos i searched for over 20 words.

okay.

then i went home happily without a care in the world cos the chinese paper's finally over.
and stuck my face in front of the com watching anime.
for the next 4 hours.

right.

i'm thinking of how the Singapore government's getting out of hand but i shan't say anything in case a Singapore government official reads my blog and i get sued or something.

riight.

haven't been blogging for so long.

my com's cranked up.

things haven't been well.
this might be the most 'suay' year of my life.

yesterday was grandma's birthday.
didn't know how they celebrated but sure was a sad occasion.

hope he's happy where he is.:)

hmm.

turning 16 on monday.

what do i want?

i want to be with my friends, family and i want world peace.

and i wanna go to england.

corny right?
but thats what i really want.

wondering when shins ever gonna come again.
damn.

its a nice saturday.

no sch.
sunny outside.
cool with the air-con on.
music on.
on the net.
what a nice slacking saturday.

i want every day to be like this.

hai but theres gonna be lotsa tests next week.

hah.
yeah. monday the choir ppl are leaving sch after only the 2nd lesson.

so theres only chem and phy.
sian lah. but nice.(:

emotional by diana degarmo on now.
nice.

ive been wondering.
where do we go after death occurs?

ghosts or angels?
i only believe in ghosts.

like, i read in the papers about this guy who practices dark magic and curses.
and he breeds ghosts.
know where he gets the ghosts?
when a pregant lady doesnt want her baby, she pays him and he gets the foetus.
he cuts her womb open, gets the baby out.
and bbq the baby.
burn it lah.
then before the child gets to see the world.
its already dead.

he says the younger the ghost, the more guai it will be.
cos the ghost have not yet seen the world, and doesnt know anything about defending himself.
therefore he will make sure the ghost obeys his orders.

creepy right?

he has a lotta those ghost children.
but after 3-4 years, he lets them go.
cos in the nether world, ghosts that are a few years old are considered old already.
then they are pretty useless to help the guy do things and stuff.

and theres this womans photo outside his door.
he says she helps him see the people outside and asks what they want.
like when he has costumers coming.
she will tell the guy about it and he would already know that the customer wants before the person steps into his house.
basically shes his right hand woman.
sees to things.
but shes a ghost.
no one has ever seen her in person.
to everyone shes a ghost.
the photo was passed from the guys teacher and now to himself.
the ghost does what her master orders.
eveything.
be it good or bad.
like the ghost children he breeds.

wow.
didnt know theres such a person around.

*shudder

at viviens house now.

supposed to be studying for tomorrows chem test but what the heck.

dunno what im gonna buy for him for v.day.

must buy this year cos ive bought stuff for him for the past 3 years and itd be weird if i dont buy this year right? and it will be the last year im buying stuff for him hai.

gonna buy something special.
instead of chocolates.
go in one end and come out the other end.
no use right?
must buy something that he will appreciate .

cant bear to think of graduating.

its been 3 years now.

thats long huh.

*sigh*

things arent so bad now.

yipee english test results wasnt bad.

im gonna have to rely alot on my eng chi and hist results.

just hope that i do well enough and just get this over with.

last nights first episode of american idol 4 was nice.

people who cant sing still look stupid as ever.

don mean to be offensive.

guess what?

new judge.

[drum roll]
mark macgrath!

hes the coolest guy on earth.
so young and successful.
rich and good-looking.

what else can a guy want, man.

nothing else, man.

bought a new adidas bottle.
same as before but this time round i bought the see-through one.
cool.

and my mom makes the best laksa.
better than the ones you eat outside.

just crapping around talking shit all day.
shitty as ever.

hari raya haji today.
no sch.
bored like shit.
but its better than being in sch.

they are all outside watching chi new year vcds.
ohh crap.
people dressed stupidly prancing around like foooooooools.

my com got problem leh.
crapp.

hmm thinking abt buying mom a pair of nice shoes on mothers day.
but thats months away.
lols.
shes been treating me good.
so she deserves to get sth.
dad too.
i will get him a wallet or shirt or tie or sth.

hah.

one more thing,

rock never dies!:)

okay.

in the sch com lab once again.
doing shitty stuff.
hist ppt, what else.

skipped hse prac hiack hiack.

yepp.
yesterdays band prac was a blast.
altho we didnt know what to do and crapped ard.
i dno how to play leh aiyo.
all the instruments were so cool.
[yepp im just a beginner]
the place was cool too.
we each paid 7 bucks.
if this goes on i will be pok!

but i hope things will work out well.
cos everybodys not free and stuff.
so we might not have time to meet up to prac.

die.

gonna fail my a math test.
i hate bionomial theorem!
ugh.

hmm really busy these few days.
i just wanna go home and snooze right now.
but homes so boring.
hai.

guess what.
im finishing my song.

i will write a story next.

and it shall be a best seller.
and i shall earn loads of money.
hiack hiack.

dream on, abbie.

disaster has struck again.

i have been meaning to write this.
but never got to it.
well cos my life has been really hectic,
i don wanna add more chaos to it.

yeahh its the tsunami thing. sad huh?

8 areas affected.
more than 127,000 ppl lost their lives.

thats a darn lot of innocent ppl.

most of them were children.
and you see the rows and rows of dead babies on the news.

that freaked me out.

anyone would be.

god gave them life. and hes back to take them away.

prolly theres a better place somewhere else.

and theyve all gone there.

one minute of silence pls.

okay.

i watched channel news asia for three whole hours [first time] this afternoon.

the part about where the tidal waves hit penang was really sad.

tears were brimming in my eyes.

i sucked them back.

anyways.

theres this muslim family living around the beach.

the wave came.

this malay guy lost 5 of this 7 children.
he was real sad. crying and stuff.

he was saying how he tried to grab them but they lost their grip.
that he would give his own life for the safety of his children.
sob.

7 children. can you imagine how lively his home used to be?
now its only his eldest daughter, youngest daughter, his wife and himself.

he lost his only son. he loved him very much.
he was his only son, only hope, he said.

he picked up the photo of his son and showed it to the camera, crying.

i cant imagine that happening to my family.

when the news of the tidal wave hitting malaysia made the news,
i prayed hard nothing happened to my family.

without them, i wont have any more purpose in life.

my family means a lot to me.
more than anything else in the world.
i love them dearly.

lucky it only affected the northern part of malaysia, penang.

my family's around the southern and central part.

and malayia's so close to singapore. what if..?

and those ppl who survived the tsunami but lost their loved ones.
they wanted to die too.

imagine. more than 127,000 lost their lives.
the many many more that survived need help.

that set the united nations organisation working.

and those who survived.
theyre affected psychologically.

it will take a long time for them to recover from the horrors of the tsunami.

or maybe never.

not to mention the destruction the waves and earthquakes caused.

so many ppl homeless, helpless.

i dunno what to say.

pls ppl. pls pray hard that the ppl who are still missing are safe and sound.

im listening to jet's move on from their get born cd.

to those ppl who survived the tsunami.
pls move on.
we will always be behind you.

amen.

im in the schools com lab right now.

faking that im doing research on a project when actually im blogging and searching for pictures of gerrad butler that phantom guy and other stuff.

2nd week of school.

and im bored outta my mind.

like the song in my blog?

i like it =)

yellowcard rocks mann.

hiack hiack hiack.

my bands gonna start soon.

cant wait. =))

i wanna be the drummer. bang away like crazy.

and loving it. [pah dah pah pah pah]

and i actually wrote a song hiack hiack hiack.

but i cant complete it.

its about sch.
and how much im hating it.

gotta go for choir rehearsal now.

ciao.

okay.

im really not ready fer sch yet!

im prepared for the worst. or the good things. whatever.

okay. thats it. im prepared.

okay. i will take anything that comes my way. but work really hard to get the thing that i really want. but bravely face the bad stuff nonetheless. [???]

[takes a breather] right. there you go. my new year resolution.

i don need too much.

make too much resolutions and disappoint yourself when you cant achieve them.

what for?

the sch keeps making changes. like, unnecessary changes.

excuse me for saying its unnecessary but if its necessary someone pls explain to me how is it necessay.

right. now we have a ten day timetable. instead of the usual five day one. odd and even week's timetable will be different. [????]

what the hell for?

we are gonna have english lang, geog and hist tomorrow. that means its the humans day of the week. yipee. its not gonna be so bad after all. if its gonna be chinese and math and chem or physics im gonna skip the first day of sch.

im listening to cong jing yi hou by shin over and over again. and im gonna listen to tiao xin by shin over and over again later on.

cos im lovin it. [pah dah pah pah pah] :P

rawk on babeee!

shin fans, pls find some way to contact me cos i wanna set up a fan club. wrong. hardcore fan club. and make our pressence known. hiack hiack hiack.

heard on radio that kelly clarkson likes the phrase, cool beans.

beans make you fart. hiack hiack.

btw what was the number one song of 2004 on the perfect 10? i need to know. i know 2003 was black eyed peas where is the love?

after the Os, im gonna have a one month vacation in malaysia. really. my heart belongs to malaysia. no kidding. i feel like im supposed to be born there but last minute god misplanned something and i ended up here.

where the education system really sucks.

okay im being harsh. it will be better for my future i know.

but im just using this place and the education system here. once im free from the evil clutches of education, im gonna be free.

i will work hard to get my first million. buy my parents a big house with ten servants.

for me? a limo. but first i gotta make the government allow me to be driven in a limo. and get personalised carparks with my name written big big on it and just enough space for my limo to be parked.

buy a big piece of land and build a bungalow. maybe a castle [that will be in england where they have the space].

i will first serve the government. then be served later on.

dream on, abbie.

so much so for my creative imagination.

wild imagination, really.

darn. should have gotten this K700i later. maybe can get the S700i. 8x digital zoom know. wtf you need so much zoom for? see people's nose hair?

one night in beijing. hmm maybe i will really go over there and spend one night there. see how it really feels. like they sing in that song? we shall see.

what? they sing about not daring to ask directions in the middle of the night cos might meet a sad ghost.

huh?

weird lah. but the song rawwks. cos shin sang it mahh.

and im lovin it. [pah dah pah pah pah]

right. im ranting about stuff that don matter.

cos i want time to pass quickly.

ohhs. one good thing about sch is that time passes really fast.

first week. swoop! second week. swoop! third week. swoop!

and so on and so forth.

yada yada yada.

and here comes the big exam.

everybody got on your feet and scream NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

ciao.

naptime!

snore.

Sian ahh.
school opens tomorrow. Shit.<--------an extra big one.
I have something really important to announce. My apostrophe[er the comma thing you put in words like hes. Short for he is. Something like that] is missing. If I put it in it will become dunno what shit character. And the dash thing. Like my chasing the sun webbie. Okay? Get it? Okay. Now I have nothing to worry about. I will try my best to not use those stuff.

Hmm. Why am I still chasing the sun? the sun is really important right? So maybe I havent found my sun yet. You know what I mean. My friend said once, dont chase the sun too much, youll get burnt. chaoda. black shit.

sian ahh.

im without my shin cd. hai.

i have decided to get the drama series. i think the whole set is about $30. for 20 discs. i wanna check out their acting skills teehees. and add that to my shin collection.

think if there was a hurricane or earthquake or natural disaster whatever [touch wood ahh] i would grab my shin collection first.

went to see them that time they came to singapore. hmm that was when they were here to promote their 3rd album hai kuo tian kong. peiying called me up. think the thing started at around 6 or 7 like that. then norine they all had to leave. that leaves me. peiying didnt want to see them. she kept apologizing [nevermind lahh!]. hmm well i stood there alone staring at shin like an idiot. we immediately knew once they arrived cos ahh xin and michael are so tall. 1.9m know! a head above everyone else. i saw michaels black face hahaha. theyre really nice. too bad chris was sick he couldnt come. think a lotta girls were disappointed cos hes the cutest in the band. im moved by ahh xin's singing. whether its live or not. i thought initially that ahh xins the kind of preserved and quiet guy. well i tell you hes not. i managed to watch the first part of the drama series cos the hai kuo tian kong cd comes with a free VCD that includes the first part of the series and a small part of a concert. he was like ta ma de this ta ma de that. some people may think thats yuck right? but you cant expect a rocker guy to be really quiet and preserved what. being wild and crazy [and vulgar?] is what makes a true rocker hahaha. that's my rock theory. aiyah i dunno lahh im just crapping. anyways they performed 6 songs from the new cd. its already very good cos usually at those concert-cum-autograph-signing sessions they don spend a lotta time on the singing. but they gave us 6 tracks. hai too bad i couldnt get the cd in time. but seeing them face to face was good enough for me heh.

this time that their new album is out. im not gonna miss that chance again. if theyd let me, id prolly bring all the rest of the albums and make them sign them all at once. yeahh! hey if you have news on their visiting singapore to promote again, don hesitate to let me know kaes.

if they stop making music anytime soon [which i doubt. they've been making music ever since i was born], i will have no more purpose in life.

i don really listen to a lotta chinese music lahh. i used to. so i know more about the older singers like jackie cheung all that lols. i like zhang zheng yue. that rocker guy with the goatee. hes got a nice voice[cheers]. if i were i guy i would grow a goatee. looks neat and cool. like mr ju also lols. craig david also have. and hes one cool son of a gun.

i realise i have a lotta things to write. blogging is a good thing know. improves your english. if your mom goes, why are you always online?!? cant you be guai and study? be more like the ahh di next door lahh blah blah.. shout back at her, im improving my english! then she comes in and sees you typing away feverishly at the pc, she will have nothing to say. i have tried it before. guaranteed success or get your money back. [what money?]

la dee dums.

i love rock and roll!

rock and roll? what has roll got to do with rock?

support local talent pls.

electrico rocks my socks.

and shin too. :P

Happy new year everybody. =))

1st Jan is new years day. 30 days more is someones big day[no its not my wedding]. You can see it in my profile thing. =))

I didnt really get to celebrate cos for no reason that I could think of, I suddenly got worried about not completing my homework then digged out my history stuff. I flipped through. And got bored. Then chucked the whole pile away. I managed to do some social studies though. I wasted an hour and a half on that.

Nothing to do. So went upstairs to aarons[not that aaron] house to look for something to do. Celebrating new year lohh, what else. They had Carlsberg. I had what, coke. That stupid nose of mine worked up again due to my refusing to turn off the air-con but the weathers really bad. So I sat there sniffling with my coke til 10.30. then finally I couldnt stand it. I went back downstairs to get my medicine. Ate it. Dozed off.

Thats how I celebrated the new year. Fun, huh? Didnt even watched the countdown.

Messaged a lotta people. Asked whether got do homework. Everybodys nonono. Especially history. Cmon loh. Choys more worried then mr ju lehh.

I shall repeat what he said on that piece of paper where got all the history assignments. The last point. Point #4: the examination timetable I mentioned – it is NO JOKE!!!

And he signed off Alexander Choy
History Co-Ordinator
29 October 2004

See. Im getting worried for him. For getting too worried. Alexander the Choy. Hahaha.

Btw is Alexander that movie NC-16 or what or not? Cos I bought the VCD in Malaysia. Got porn lehh! Yuckies. But Alexander the Great supposed to be homo also. That Colin Farrell acting as Alexander hugged a guy and said, I miss you too. Hahah. Then got another scene is he touch the guy’s face and talk to him with their faces really close together. I wonder if Colin Farrell had goosebumps when acting or watching himself to that. Cos in real life I think hes supposed to be real flirty and a womans guy. No men for him. Funny!

Right. So I be a bit guai guai. I did the history workbook halfway. The St. Margarets and St. Anthonys paper I did a bit. I read through Odyssey and Modern World. This shows that I still love history deeply. Despite what the teachers do, despite how our all time fave teacher is.

Suddenly I feel like changing blogskin again hahaha.

I like track 9 on jets cd. Cold hard bitch haha. Cold hard bitch! Youre just a kiss on the lips blah blah. Nice.

The skys so dark. God must be crying for the people caught in the tsunami thing. Real sad.

These few years a lotta bad things happened right. 911, SARS, the Saddam Hussein and Bush thing, Bird flu blah blah and now this.

Zhang dong liangs singing is actually not bad. but not as good as shin lahh hahaha. I love saying that. Not as good as shin lahh.

A 9 year old girl just called up perfect 10 to dedicate a song. Siaow.